THE DREAM OF DEEP AND VITAL SLEEP

Keirle, Gordon; Guardian of Sleep; Leicestershire County Council Artworks Collection; http://www.artuk.org/artworks/guardian-of-sleep-82510

I suffer so from poor sleep—

Interrupted sleep, to be precise.

(I can barely keep my eyes open after nine pm)

And once again, last night,

awoken by noise and movement,

I found myself staring at the digital display

on the clock radio:

 1:30

(I was unlucky, it’s usually more like

3:10 or 3:30 or even 4:00)

 

 

When this happens, I know

I’ll toss and turn for a long,

time-devouring stretch,

awash in thoughts of everything

unresolved in my life, feeling flushed,

ants of anxiety under my skin.

Sometimes, if four is antemeridian, and

I find myself awake, I forfeit the sleep

in exchange for time alone which

is nothing like lonely or uneasy,

but feels rather more like time stolen,

appropriated from the Universe and

made mine.

There’s a cost to this brazen shoplifting

of minutes and hours—a penalty.

Research shows that the hours unslept

are snatched from the end of our lives.

(I learned this only this week)

This seems unjust, and yet

While I covet the dream of deep and vital sleep,

I’m caught red-handed with the irony

that I did in fact fall back into sleep sometime

after 1:30 this morning, held on tight till

7:02 and have felt cheated

and pressed for time

ever since.

Selway, John; ‘As I rode to sleep’ Fern Hill Series; Amgueddfa Cymru – National Museum Wales; http://www.artuk.org/artworks/as-i-rode-to-sleep-fern-hill-series-162254

 

AT ANY REMOVE

I hear and read a lot about

our enslavement to technology—

especially to our smart phones.

I call them that without irony in spite of what people say.

 

There’s a photographer who wanted to

show us how lonely

we’ve become, how alienated from

each other,

by having people pose—couples,

families, friends and lovers—

holding invisible phones.

He called his project Removed.

Seeing the cleverness in his black and white photos, people began

sharing them on Facebook, on Twitter,

virtually every which way;

which did seem ironic to me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I placed my smart phone on the kitchen counter

after work today, while I was preparing supper.

It didn’t take long for its black screen to light up and then

it buzz-buzzed as it vibrated.

It was one of my three sons, messaging in, interested

in the day I had, and wanting me to look

at something he’d written; happy to HAHAHAHAHAHA

and emoji in response to

a funny photo I took of the inside of the dishwasher

(there’s a private story there)

 

We were conspirators in real time,

he in his apartment and me in my kitchen, and I just know

that we were both smiling in real time, and I thought

how wonderful my small black phone is to bring

my beautiful son right into the kitchen next to me,

and just then, his younger brother, working way up

in the Arctic, at 72° 15’ 00” N / 80° 30’ 00” W,

(which is easily found on your GPS-enabled phone)

began texting me too. Bzzz-buzz-buzz

 

Thanks to my smart phone, my sons

were no longer at

any remove at all.

 

August 29th 2017